Niagara Falls – Yes Frankenstein, My Blood Did Curdle!!

 

Even taking this I got sopping wet. The wind carries the spray for ages.

Apart from Mike the Driver, I was the only one in the 21 seater Niagara Airbus shooting down The Queen Elizabeth Highway from Pearson Airport in Toronto to Niagara Falls. We’d left Pearson at 9 pm on Sunday night.

Mike & I had chatted freely during the 1 ¼ hour trip & when we got to Niagara Falls he said that he’d take me via “the tackiest street in the world – Centre St.” Sadly, it probably is a contender for that title. Even more sadly, it made logistical sense to walk down the street when I wanted to get to The Falls from my hotel.

Clifton Hill. Actually, by day it seemed even worse. Neon lights often act like make up on an ageing prostitute.

But you need to create the sound effects for yourself. Blood curdling screams - raucous music.

Glow in the Dark Putt Putt Golf tried to Out-Neon Castle Dracula & Ripley’s Believe It Or Not & not one, not two, but three House of Cuban Cigars. Brick City screamed for attention over a host of Fast Food Emporia. You had a choice of excitement in wax – Rock Stars, Criminals or Louis Tussard’s. But the most insistently annoying yelling that drifted across the street was The House of Frankenstein. It warned the faint of heart not to enter. It pleaded with punters to ensure that you were up to the frightful horror of it all, because once you entered “there was no going back.” It promised to be “blood curling.” And it seemed to be part of a Burger King AND a Travel Lodge Motel – but I wasn’t going to cross the road to investigate.

The number of gulls surprized me.

It wasn’t as if I was expecting pristine wilderness. The Lonely Planet guide reminds you to just focus on The Falls, & when you’re actually there, they are indeed awesome. The Maid of the Mist boat trip – operating since 1847 – was certainly worth the effort. Mind you, I couldn’t help but notice that a few punters seemed grim faced & tight lipped because they got wet. What on earth did they expect? A Virtual Experience?? Well, even at the Virtual Experience – the newish Fury of The Falls – you get wet.

The Journey Behind the Falls. It's just mesmerising

The less spectacular American Falls. My favourite daredevil stunt was Blondin. He not only did the tightrope thing, he took a stove over on a rope & cooked & ate a two egg omelette.

It claimed – after warning you to not even think of taking photographs – that it was going to reveal how the falls were created in a multimedia extravaganza. At first I thought the poncho-issuing was an over the top gimmick to go with the twee animation about Chip Flat-tail who gets help during detention from a flirtatious owl about what to write in an essay on the Creation of the Falls. But then we moved onto a giant disc that shook, rattled & rolled as the huge circular screen compressed a few million years into a few minutes. Bolts of lightning, snow flurries, & yes, water swirled around until the pivotal moment when the wall split asunder & the falls were created. Kinda groovy – although not for the Japanese lady who had to be assisted from the pavilion midway thru feeling faint. Hope she doesn’t take on Frankenstein.

But I think I most enjoyed the Journey Behind the Falls. Down at the bottom level of The Horse-shoe Falls you are just to one edge. At such close quarters, you really gain an appreciation of the mighty power of The Falls. Statistics – “In summer 154 million litres per minute plunge over The Falls” – have no punch. Awesome seems inadequate – but what other word is there?

The area was the first apparentl, to build Hydro electric powerstations. It also played a significant role in the 1812 war.

After seeing The Falls from every possible angle – except from a chopper, tho I did think about it – I caught the ever so handy Canadian Parks Niagara Bus Shuttle to The Botanic Gardens & Butterfly Conservatory. With its bog garden & parterre garden & crab-apple grove & beautiful landscaping, the Botanic Gardens were a delightful change of pace. But especially the Butterfly Conservatory – as gentle, floating & flitting as Niagara is relentless, assertive & brutal. Mind you, trying to take a photograph of The Blue Mephisto nearly brought me undone.

And it occurred to me as I was lugging my body up Centre St, that the people outside of Frankenstein’s House of Horrors looked different than the folk at The Butterfly Conservatory. On Centre St, folk were drifting around licking their ice-creams looking as though they were s’posed to be there but weren’t quite sure why. They were waiting for something to happen. Looking a bit bored. Nobody was smiling.

At the Butterfly place, people spoke to total strangers. Children had a look of wonderment on their faces as a Monarch settled on their kid sister’s hair. One man plucked a flower from one of the plants, gave it to his woman and hugged her. Older couples just sat there soaking it all in.

Mike the bus driver said he’d lived close to Niagara all his life & loved it. Great for people watching, he said. I wonder if he’d ever been to look at the butterflies.